There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
