oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
please don't ironically join a cult
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