sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Randomize
