john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
