He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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