Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
