Having a random hookup so left but love u
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
