She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
My vagina just recognized that song.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
