you're like a bully in the Christmas story
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
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