saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
