hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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