I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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