East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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