you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
