I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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