I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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