Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
