Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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