Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
