he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I'm at about main and main street
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize