I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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