we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
