Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
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