So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
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I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
