strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
