I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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