you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
