He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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