return my video game
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize