I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
