you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
