the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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