this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Randomize
