That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
it hurts more in the daytime
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Randomize
