Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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