Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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