next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
