I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
