i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
