"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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