Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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