I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize
