by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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