I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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