we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
