EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
My cat gives me a boner
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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