dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize