Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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