I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
