I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
