My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
this will be a night to untag.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
